just make a promise and commit ...

shadows of my past keep reappearing … they have no place in my life anymore.

you are part of my life now.

it’s been more than two months, and if we both want it and do accordingly, then these two months can be multiplied

I am scared – scared of your insecurities, scared of you being scared and refusing to let him go

and once you leave and once I am not around I fear that “a la swe” will be left behind

yet I try to enjoy every moment I have with you

I constantly  lie to myself that you are not sending him kisses and using sweet names, yet I see it, try to deceive myself that you are not somehow still trying to make things work with him, yet i saw different, trying not to be jealous that your emotional attention is not dedicated to me only, yet I see your focus switching to three, trying to forget about the fact that even though we are together – you are still with him – and I wonder if you and I really are… every time you tell me you don’t know me yet, and every time that you delay your end with him – you are hurting me, and making me go away – yet I’ve stood up so many times already … I wonder how and IF I’ll manage living with the fact that you’ll be in his grasp for two weeks, kissing him, being with him, less attention to me because of him will frankly put me questioning .. and god forbid you have your plans with him after that … as if the former’s not a question big enough to make me wonder whether I should still go on …

yet it is just too beautiful, so much potential …